Slave to Fashion

Do you ever see someone wearing something, and wonder to yourself whether it's that they're incredibly fashion-forward or they just don't have a mirror? That person is me.

When I got these paisley tights, I thought they were the coolest fucking thing I'd ever seen. They don't fit me all that well, so I'll share with you that today when I wore them I wore a pair of underwear OVER them just to keep them from sliding all the way down my butt. I wore them today to work with a dark blue sweater dress and a yellow cardigan.

I always make Andy approve my outfits, and he said that I looked 'fun' and 'cute', so off I went to work. When I got here, one of the HR ladies said I was 'so bold'. She has a way of saying things where you're not sure if it's a backhanded compliment or a thinly-veiled insult, so I didn't really say anything back.

This is the same woman who a few weeks ago when I was coming in from outside told me I looked like a bag lady. When I very sarcastically thanked her, she seemed surprised I'd taken offense and told me she meant it in a good way.

HOW do you say someone looks like a bag lady and intend for it to be a good thing?!

[Note: In addition to being "bold", I also don't own a proper full-length mirror (I have one, but it's decades old, cracked and covered in weird brown dots that make it difficult to see anything in it.).]